Introspection

I love to take in the things around me...the environment...the energy that people exude. I liken myself to a cat, very observant and often cautious to jump in head first. I have always tried to learn from other people's mistakes...sometimes not so successfully, but I have definitely tried! I try to think outside of the box and to see things from other people's points of view. In fact, I often set out to see things from a new perspective. But I have my own convictions and motivations, many of which have seen me through my childhood and into my adult life. I feel like, with the exception of a few periods of personal discovery, I have always known who I am and what it is about me that makes me special. I have my parents and my family to thank for that...my sister, Amanda, who always tells me those words exactly...you're special. I have a healthy thirst for knowledge that sometimes overwhelms me and leaves me sitting on the couch in front of the TV to veg, in denial of it all. Maybe that is due to my incessant need to procrastinate...for the hated and revered alike. I love words...I love to check the dictionary, not so much to find new words, but to ensure that I use the words that I have soaked up along the way correctly. I often get stuck trying to find the right words to say. Sometimes this causes me to keep my thoughts and feelings to myself...for fear that I may not be able to convey them properly...to do them justice. As I blog and become a blogger, I find myself sitting in my car on my way to/from work/school and pondering my next blog. I read other blogs. I get blog envy. I plot ways to become as witty and creative as these other bloggers. I notice how their creativity, wittiness and fun-ness jumps off the page and realize that I am not like them. So, I sit at my computer, as I have done right now, and realize who I am. I am all of those things that I have listed. Maybe I do have a little bit of creativity, wittiness and fun-ness in me...but I realize that I am just who I am and that's all I need to be.